Happy to be Home?

Since arriving back on New Zealand soil I think it is fair to say I have repeated my story at least 34 1/2 times, obviously some a little more censored than others… “Honestly Nan, my understanding of the Catholic movement in the Vatican City flourished after my guided tour”

Needless to say the retelling process can get a little old… 

Yes, I ate too much Pizza, No, I did not eat a snail and Yes, all I remember about my trip is the food. 

Obviously I cherish my memories overseas, and I love sharing my stories and relishing in the few gasps I have received in reply. Travelling for an extended period of time is not something to be taken lightly, it is both a cherished yet challenging experience all wound up into a ball of crazy, stupid decisions that leave you with red wine withdrawals and a quick dash through customs avoiding all dogs in sight.

However, coming home with nothing but some golden penis slippers, which are now no longer thanks to my mothers sheer determination to ‘more than circumcise’ my glorious Amsterdam souvenir, I am left wondering if the loss of my ‘hopeful house deposit fund’ was a fund well spent. Sure you gain a greater historical understanding of the world, you make some fabulous new friends and you invest in buying some bigger jeans. But other than my obvious ‘shift’ in weight and mighty fine Instagram reel,  is there anything else that goes to show for the life I have lived these past six months.

Have I changed, matured or more importantly, just got my shit together?

Before I left on this journey I talked to a small few about the kind of woman I wanted to become, someone who cared for others, because to be honest – you already know – I am pretty selfish and rather fabulous at it. And although caring for yourself is great, caring for others puts yourself in a position to let others care for you in return…sometimes. Regardless, I wanted to care and I wanted to express my care in a way that actually impacts the lives of others and benefits those I love, those I hate and those I don’t even know. 

And with that, I am happy to announce I have changed. I don’t like building myself up, a serious flaw in New Zealand culture, where when one praises ones self it it considered boastful and prideful. However, surrounding myself with those from other ends of the world, I have found the confidence to encourage myself and celebrate my own change and growth. Its awesome to give yourself a good pat on the back every once in a while, I mean, why not? You’re bloody brilliant!

However, in terms of maturity… Well, although I like to think I have ‘matured’, that small flame of hope was put out rather quickly with my sudden urge to rub my penis slipper in my mothers face every time I saw her eyeing them out with pure disgust. And in terms of getting my shit together, I applied for Uni, got a full-time job, and ate some vegetables today, so I guess you could say my shit is neatly tied together with a ribbon on top.

So…. If you haven’t caught up with my since I have been home, heres a few answers to some ‘popular’ questions I have encountered…

  1. My favourite country was Croatia
  2. Yes, my mother won, I am attending Uni next year and finishing a Business and Phsycology conjoint
  3. Yes my chastity belt remained in place while I was away 
  4. No, I did not fall in love with an Italian…in Italy *sly emoji
  5. No, I am never having children #nannylife

Enjoy your week and drink some wine on my behalf – I have been unable to touch alcohol since I landed… Smart Household Rehab is doing great things in my life.


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